How Quickly Things Change

When I first began planning this website, I didn’t anticipate a nearly nine month gap between the first ‘Welcome’ entry and the next article or post. 2020 for many was a test of strength and endurance amidst the worst pandemic since the flu following the first World War. For me, it quickly became a year to forget.

On the 18th of August, 2020, I lost my older brother to a freak medical episode. In an instant, my inspiration, role model, and greatest supporter of my music, was ripped away from us. At just 34 years of age, his death feels cruel and unjustified. Our family has taken a long time to recover, which is a poor choice of word given we may never fully complete our grief. I was unable to pause university study due to complications, and was left fighting through a semester of difficult subjects while traversing grief’s cycle. Needless to say, a terrible year, and a terrible time to be developing a website on top of an engineering degree.

However, each day becomes easier than the one before, and time humbles us. If there is one thing I am certain of, it’s that James would never have allowed me to throw in any towels against seemingly insurmountable odds, and so my journey contiues. Each day has purpouse and newfound dedication devoted to his strong work ethic, and each music project an opportunity to honor his memory.

So, what does this mean for Music by Kinesthetics? For now, a series of articles are being produced for this site, some technical skills, some breakdowns of big tracks, and several of my tracks are finally seeing completion since all went on hold for the year gone. A lot of planning has gone into preparing site updates and posts as useful as can be for musicians of all skill levels, as has building a consistent habit of article-writing and music production.

I don’t believe there comes a time where the grief and loss ends, but each day gets that little bit easier. For me, it has given newfound drive and devotion, despite the setbacks faced, and a new sense of respect for life and its many facets of reality, given just how quickly it can end. I do what I do not just for me, or those I wish to help, but for the brother I wish I could embrace just one more time.

Thank you for everything, James, and I’ll see you on the other side.

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